This weekend my husband and i have been set up at Heroes Comic Convention in Charlotte, NC. It has been okay but we have both been really bummed by the children at the show. Mostly little brown haired babies in superhero costumes. It is so hard to see all these babies and not wonder why couldn't my baby still be alive. I was doing okay though.. well "okay" being I had not cried since Tuesday. I took this as coping, but was getting easily irritated and mad at stupid stuff. We drove down here with my husbands mom and stayed with his mom's college friend M.
Today when we got back from the show M had left us a gift on the bed we are sleeping on. Enclosed was a sweet card which said she wished she would have had the chance to know Carter. I felt the tears in my eyes but they did not come. About 10 minutes later my husband was showing M pictures of Carter. She kept putting her hand over her mouth, and saying how perfect and sweet he was. She was talking to me while my husband went to sit down on a chair. She kept talking about Carter even after i had stopped and touched upon things he should have been able to do. I lost it, the tears came and M kept talking about it making the tears continue. I could tell my husbands mom was uncomfortable, but whatever. I appreciated M's support and love for us and Carter. My son is a very lucky boy to have so many people love him and appreciate him. Even when people stop talking about him I have to remember that he is still in everyones hearts.
This is what M got us in remembrance of Carter. It will look amazing next to his tree.